(Reuters) Washington DC

BREAKING NEWS: To the horror of their parents, millions of US school children who listened or watched President Obama's speech today returned home from school completely transformed into Russian Bolsheviks. Virtually all of them wore authentic period costumes with heavy felt boots, bowl haircuts, and belted tunics. Most disturbing to their parents, they all had stopped speaking English and spoke only colloquial Russian. Riots broke out is several large cities when thousands of children armed with farm implements and torches raided government offices and places of worship. Distraught parents sought help from police and local agencies to no avail. 911 calls have crashed the emergency call systems in several major cities. In the last few hours since the business day has begun on the East Coast, the National Guard has been posted around all banks due to the large number of attempts by marauding youth to redistribute the wealth. Attempts to interview many of the rioters was fruitless because of the pervasive language issue. One reporter for Fox News who actually spoke Russian translated his on-the-spot interview with one of the demonstrators. The boy kept screaming; "Up with the Proletariat Peoples Student Revolution Inspired by Chairman Obama's Masterful Indoctrination!" Elsewhere, there has been a run on beets causing beet prices to skyrocket.

How is it possible that on politics.gather.com there is not a single article on President Obama's plan to speak to school children?

These pages are not timely with hot topics.

I recently traveled to Ontario, Canada and spoke with a politicically active teacher about our health care snafu.  She was perfectly happy with Canadian health care, and was confused about Americans who consider this form of care "Communistic."  According to NPR, many French and German people feel the same.  Do these American conservatives also label our Canadian, French and German allies "communistic"?

Here Read:

+ New climate change legislation overlooks a major GHG source: industrial ag / Grist Magazine:

–”The bill fails to address greenhouse gas emission reductions from agriculture, factory farms, and animal manure whatsoever–and even goes the extra mile to specifically exempt the entire sector from any type of regulation.”

“Enteric fermentation is literally the largest source of methane emissions in the entire country.”

+ EPA’s Landfill Methane Outreach Program / EPA:

–”Municipal solid waste landfills are the second largest source of human-related methane emissions in the United States.”

“At the same time, methane emissions from landfills represent a lost opportunity to capture and use a significant energy source.”

Also read:

+ Beware emissions trading, airlines stand to make billions / Mother Jones,

+ The Carbon Folly / BusinessWeek,

+ The Case Against Carbon Trading / Transnational Institute:

–”…Citigroup’s Peter Atherton confessed that the European Union’s Emission Trading Scheme had ‘done nothing to curb emissions.’ He admitted,‘Prices up, emissions up, profits up …’ Who wins and loses? Coal and nuclear-based generators–biggest winners. Hedge funds and energy traders–even bigger winners. Losers … Consumers!”

Rather than cap-and-trade, the Govt. should set caps on GreenHouse Gas emission, then provide 0-interest loans for companies to Go Green (when such cannot afford to).

Also Read:

+ Loophole may mean bigger, not smaller, cars / MSNBC:

--"New rules may actually encourage automakers to build behemoths."

"Too bad the rules will discourage automakers from manufacturing the kind of small cars that the Obamaites favor and, in some cases, encourage carmakers to do exactly the opposite. That's right: make some models bigger."

"... the legislation, while forcing a significant boost in fuel economy, has loopholes big enough to drive a truck through."

"But say a big SUV misses its target by one mile per gallon. A carmaker could just make the vehicle a bit larger, allowing it to hit an easier fuel economy target."

"'The system doesn't do anything to encourage smaller vehicles,' ... And even if gasoline prices rise again and prompt consumers to look for smaller cars, he says, the new rules give automakers less incentive to sell more of them.

+ From Bagels to Coal Fires: An Unorthodox Economist Keeps Pushing for Change / NY Times, 2007:

–”… the abundance of underground coal fires in abandoned mines and other places that not only waste coal but contribute mightily to worldwide carbon dioxide emissions.”

”… underground fires in China alone contribute as much CO2 to the atmosphere each year as all the cars and light trucks in the U.S.”

Meanwhile, the Climate Change Bill grants BILLIONS in subsidies to Clean Coal.

Here Read:

+ The Illusion of Clean Coal / The Economist:

+ Trouble in store--Carbon capture and storage / The Economist:

+ The Dirty Truth About Clean Coal / BusinessWeek,

+ King Coal's Latest Con--Clean Coal is Not Clean / CommonDreams